Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
