i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
