So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
im on a boat
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