Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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