its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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