shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
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