Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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