i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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