ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize
