Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Randomize
