hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
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