I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
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