Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?