Texts From Last Night

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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.

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  (651): drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then. http://tfl.nu/hp3p
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.

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  (703): We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college. http://tfl.nu/pxwn
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?

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  (412): he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went? http://tfl.nu/rnh5
  Replies (64) Good night (3623) Bad night (5139) Order T-Shirt
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  (225): View more from Louisiana

  wtf

  (1-225): View more from Louisiana

  I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?

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  (225): wtf (1-225): I'm guessing you saw the bathroom? http://tfl.nu/q0h6
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  (818): View more from California

  Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself

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  (818): Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself http://tfl.nu/kb63
  Replies (8) Good night (2601) Bad night (516) Order T-Shirt
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.

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  (918): It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes. http://tfl.nu/hbc7
  Replies (8) Good night (3059) Bad night (827) Order T-Shirt
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again

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  (419): Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again http://tfl.nu/9um4
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.

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  (610): I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal. http://tfl.nu/tm9u
  Replies (13) Good night (982) Bad night (3234) Order T-Shirt
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  (817): View more from Texas

  There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.

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  (817): There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be. http://tfl.nu/26vp
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  (078): View more from

  Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!

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  (078): Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?! http://tfl.nu/fofo
  Replies (9) Good night (847) Bad night (789) Order T-Shirt
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?

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  (919): I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent? http://tfl.nu/tgod
  Replies (3) Good night (741) Bad night (255)
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  (218): View more from Minnesota

  I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...

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  (218): I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin... http://tfl.nu/zsou
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?

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  (303): WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING? http://tfl.nu/q4gt
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  (562): View more from California

  New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.

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  (562): New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches. http://tfl.nu/v2w2
  Replies (9) Good night (662) Bad night (273) Order T-Shirt
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  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself

  (1-306): View more from Saskatchewan

  You mean maximum 5?

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  (306): I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself (1-306): You mean maximum 5? http://tfl.nu/1ybr
  Replies (5) Good night (814) Bad night (160) Order T-Shirt

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