As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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