Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
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