SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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