Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
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