i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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