I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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