So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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