Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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