Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
is wine microwaveable?
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
