I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
I am spending my child support on dildos
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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