Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Randomize