So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Randomize
