Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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