I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
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