Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Randomize
