He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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