due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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