I could have mohawked her pubes.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
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