I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Randomize