we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
