How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
