I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
