i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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