Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize