i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
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