No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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