He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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