He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
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