Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize
