420 ftw
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
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