It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
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