What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
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