do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
I woke up with a black eye and dim memories of announcing that i had super powers. I shoved my pockets full of canned tuna and tried to jump off the balcony. And then my boyfriend called the cops.
so you're not coming in to work today?
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
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