i jhust puked up my retainher.
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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