is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize
