i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
I smell like Dick and happiness
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
