just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
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