There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
You were trust falling into bushes
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize
